Fleeting Moments

On the 1st of December this year (yes, 2 days ago), the realization that we're close to the end of another year naturally dawned on me. And I really couldn't figure out where the year had gone. I lived 2017 so intensely (too intensely for my liking), that the relative relaxation of 2018 has me confusing timelines like an exhausted time traveler. While doing my 2018 self assessment at work, I had to redo sections of my write up because what I'd thought I'd done in 2018 was actually a flashback from 2017 and no longer relevant. The year was punctuated by big moments every now and then, but mostly, it was a year that was whiled away with a vengeance. The only thing lasting that I've got out of this year is my conviction to not use my body like a dustbin after 33 years of food-abuse. Strangely, the moment that I decided that is the only lucid moment from this year. Seriously, where did the year go! Does everyone feel that way?

We're now at the brink of 2019. And like every December, despite knowing that time's just an illusion, I am getting excited about how I want to spend the coming year. Making healthy food choices is already sorted. Getting regular exercise - not so much. Reiki and meditation aren't as regular as they should be. I rarely write, despite the most inspiring gift by the husband on our anniversary (a peacock feather quill  and ink set!). And I know that the more I write, the more likely I am to get better at it. Maybe there's something in it. I started last year with a writing prompt a day. But laziness soon throttled the creative soul inside me. And I picked passive consumption of random media, over creation of new, joyous tales. I'm on a FB/Insta free trial period right now (I really shouldn't call it a "period" - I deleted the apps from my phone only last night, and have been picking up my phone every 38 seconds like an addict looking for a fix and not getting it). But it's a start. What I realized was, that my 30 seconds of fame on Facebook every other day, make me not want to work for something extraordinary in life. And at the end of the day, it's living with a purpose that makes life worthwhile. Living Facebook post to post - not so much. If I see the merit in it, I might just deactivate my FB and Insta accounts on 31st December and reclaim what it means to live life without having to post about it/ thinking up cool one-liners to go with random images. Actually, while writing about it, I feel the conviction getting stronger. Maybe I don't want those small popularity boosts anymore, but want to genuinely build a meaningful life that is not dependent on show off opportunities. Maybe it won't be everything I dream of, but I'm sure that after years of mind-numbing media consumption, it'll definitely bring some new perspectives into my life. I should really write the Heritage Walk post before I leave though! A promise is a promise!

So 2019 seems promising already! I am super excited about making writing and meditation a priority. And improving relationships with people in my life. And writing more frequently than the two years spent off this blog. Here's to new paths!

Opinions Opinions Everywhere - So Much Unrest!

I have been on Planet Earth for 31 years, of which I have vivid memories from the time I was about 6. Never ever in the last 25 years have I seen so much discussion around politics. Never! Ever! Whatever discussion I had been a part of/ overheard, seemed to be policy driven rather than person driven. And this makes you wonder. Have people lost it completely in the recent times? Or was it the lack of social media that caused the idiots to keep their mouths closed and not add to the growing din?

Anyone and everyone on Planet Earth has an opinion. A majority of them have NO IDEA about the facts. And worse, they don't want to start educating themselves anytime soon. As a result, every discussion boils down to - "I am right because I am right, and you're wrong because you're wrong". Rumour mongers (including our esteemed politicians) are having a field day because their nonsense can spread so easily to all corners of the world (I'm looking at you Kejriwal). I am a Facebook addict, and yet there are days when I want to delete my profile and dedicate my life to reading books. I try to put happy stuff in there to counteract the craziness - but it seems to be a lost cause.

At the end of the day, I can only change myself. So I solemnly swear that I'm going to never ever spread unverified information (not even harmless forwards), and I'm going to probably start a blog which has facts rather than opinions. The demonetization drive would be a good place to start given the furore.

Sending the world peace vibes. Trying to find the light in everyone.

That awful sense of entitlement

Yesterday, I was lucky to be invited for a web session by the global communications team at work where I chanced upon the phrase "Strawberry Generation". Apparently, millennials are compared with that delicious fruit because for all their sweetness and exoticness, they bruise easily. Try saying a handful of words that you know won't go down well with a millennial, and you'll be tagged on a Facebook post about it before you can say "Yikes!".

The world of marketing is obsessed with the millennials since more often than not, they know what they want. And the speed at which they move from one area of interest to another keeps the competition interesting and the arena wide open for newcomers to make a mark. Off late though, one gets the feeling that they all come along with a strong sense of entitlement and a need for instant gratification. As if the world owes them everything, never mind their contribution to it. I think in that regard, The Secret has done more harm than good. If you work hard for a month, you instantly want a promotion. If you workout for a couple of days, you instantly want to look like a Victoria's Secret model. If you've started a business, you instantly want to become a multi millionaire. Reality check: things don't exactly work that way.

A possible explanation could be the fact that middle class has now graduated to the "upper middle class" and kids have grown up getting everything they laid their pudgy hands on. That, and television. You look at Friends, and you just assume that you'll get paid handsomely for "chillin' " in a coffee shop while you tend to work every once in a while. The movie version of life is so awesome. I remember watching movies when I was younger, and wondering how people jump out of bed, into clothes and rush out to do awesome things, while I spend at least half an hour in the loo and the bath trying to get my bearings after 15 whole minutes of sipping tea in a leisurely manner. Else my day goes downhill right from the beginning!

Recently a Yelp employee wrote a stinker to her CEO in the form of an "Open Letter" because she wasn't happy with her pay. Gone are the days when "struggle" was romanticized. Now, we want to follow our whims, umm, dreams, get paid at par with investment bankers, get nice long holidays to spend that money on fancy trips abroad, update all of this on Facebook, Instagram and SnapChat and tell the world how awesome our lives are. Never mind  the fact that my dream is something I am awful at. Or that the amount of value I add to my organization does not justify the amount in my paycheck.

Not all millennials are stuck up and demanding. But that's the trend. I am a borderline Millennial (mid 80s), and I know how I react when I don't get what I want. That's right - react, not respond. All those months of meditation go straight out of the window when that happens and it takes a while before I can respond to the situation like a mature, slightly evolved human being. Expectation is the root of all misery, and we keep forgetting that much to our own chagrin. In my calmer moments, I remember that tale about a tennis star who got cancer and instead of crying about it said that he never questioned the good things coming his way ever, so why should he question the inconvenient things that life had in store for him?

The world was here way before you were a peanut sized entity in your mum's womb. The world will be here when you've turned to ashes. It owes you nothing. If you really want happiness, quit expecting it from random strangers or objects. Find it within yourself. That's the only hope anyone's really got.

No book reviews. Nope.

Although my "good year" run continues in terms of reading books, I've decided that I won't be starting a book review blog after all. Reason? I hate reviewing books. This is my life, not an English assignment. I may write about my takeaway from a book if it really moves me, but I don't want to critique the books I read. And I don't want to tell people what to read and what not to read. I read for my pleasure, and that's going to be the only reason that I will continue reading.

Phew! Ever since I told myself that I'll be reviewing books, I felt under so much stress. It's like a weight has been lifted! I'm glad though that the promises I make myself have some value at least :D.

A Big Year: A Reading Odyssey

Yesterday evening I watched the last 45 minutes of a movie called "The Big Year". It was about how a number of men, who are obsessed with birding, try to make that year their "Big Year" by spotting and capturing on camera the largest no. of birds. I think I'm going to have a big year in terms of books this year (and maybe blogposts, given that I've crossed my previous year's poor outcome by 3 posts across 2 blogs already :D).

I had practically lost my reading bug over the last few years. I read books - but they were few and far in between. I had degenerated from being a voracious reader till college to someone who got through 3-4 books a year because vegetating in front of some screen was more exciting. How misguided was I!

Thankfully, a November miracle happened last year, that led to my finishing 6 books in the last two months of the year! This year, I've continued with my great run, and finished 4 books in January itself! I think the Facebook Secret Santa post helped to an extent, because I received brand new authors from absolute strangers that opened up so many new possibilities for me! New words. New insights. It's all so dreamy!

I'm planning to start yet another blog this year, which will include book reviews. I suck at book reviews for some reason (I'm so much better at reviewing movies and TV series), so this will be a personal challenge of sorts.

Excited to say the least :)

Mondays

How did Monday transform into the most hated day of the week? Shouldn't it be the most exciting day technically? After all, the world returns recharged after the weekend, to take on brand new challenges and to the smell of new possibilities and all that?

I was talking to a coworker the other day, and she said that it's as if we only live for 2 days a week. The rest are spent doing things we just don't enjoy. It's mechanical, often dreary, and nearly everyday is the same at work. Wake up in the morning, rush to work, rush through emails, rush through meetings (and subsequent minutes), rush back home. This sort of existence can't be good for anyone!

And though Mark Manson wrote in this extremely illuminating article, that it's not necessary that your passion and your means of earning a living coincide (http://markmanson.net/passion), the fact that we spend so much time at work, makes you wonder if not doing what you love is worth it at all. (But then the salary check hits your account, and things are alright again for about 3 days :P.)

After being in the corporate world for over 6 years, I REALLY want to WANT to come to work in the morning. I want to wake up excited about what I do. And I want to earn a comfortable living doing just that. Is it too much too hope for? Maybe not. I'll tell you why.

If you read Mark's article, one thing leaps out at you.

"The problem isn’t passion. It’s never passion.

It’s priorities."

 

For instance, I know what I love best in this world is writing. I am no Shakespeare, but I do manage to write an engaging prose when I get down to it. How often do I get down to it? The last time I did it was 3 years ago. Did I not have time? Bullshit. I was lazy. Nothing else. In the amount of time I've wasted in the last 3 years, I could have churned out at least 2 books. You see what I mean?

 

Almost all of us know what we are good at. What we truly enjoy doing. Almost all of us make excuses to stay away from that. If that ain't stupid, I don't know what is.

 

Oh well. Leaving you with my favourite lines from the article (read it already!). If this won't get you started, nothing will :)

 

"A child does not walk onto a playground and say to herself, “How do I find fun?” She just goes and has fun."

My New Blog!

I decided to start a new blog that's dedicated to the good things that happen in our world everyday. Trying to combat negativity in a world that's refusing to look at the brighter side of things in daily life. Happy Reading :)

http://themagickmarker.blogspot.in/

Cheers!

For the love of travel!

I always feel like a changed person after coming back from a vacation. At least for a couple of days. The thing is, that the humdrum of daily existence makes me forget to look at the world as if I were seeing everything for the first time. In exotic new lands, I relearn that art and am so much happier for it. The first few days back home make me look at the everyday things in life with the same curiosity. The ever-changing leaves on the trees, a flower bush in the middle of nowhere, an adorable puppy on the sidewalk - I notice it all. Then the magic goes away, and I move around with my nose in my phone, the world lying forgotten to one side.

Anyhow, coming back to travel. I love the way everyone transforms when they're away from home. It's like you no longer have to be the person you and others around you are used to. You are free to be a more liberated version of yourself. You become one with the strangers around you who are all marveling at the same sight. You are one with nature that seems to overwhelm you by her beauty, now that you've gotten around to actually look at her wonders. You are one with your highest and happiest self after a long time. How can that not be beautiful and fulfilling!

Now if only I could learn to be that way everyday, and learn to treat life like the miracle it is, I'll be all set and nirvana-d out :D. Here's to creating your own happiness!